trust
was talking to crabby about some relationship stuff earlier...
wad we talked about got me thinking...
wads the point of being a couple,
when u dun let your other half know wad you are going through?
when you cannot say wad u wanna say?
when you cannot express your emotions?
when you cannot be yourself when you two are out?
you say you love him too much to do that...
you say i dun know, i dun understand...
but yes i know and i understand...
all too clearly how it feels...
how it make ur heart bleed so much that you wish you could just die...
when u love this person so much,
you dun wan your other half to be sad cos you are sad...
you wan to see your other half smile and be happy...
cos your source of happiness comes from this person...
but who can you tell all these to?
who will listen?
who will listen to you say all these?
when you've come to this stage,
a heart to heart talk just comes to mind...
cos its just the most natural thing to come into play...
but..
wad if you cant?
wad if it just hurts you to look at him?
wad if it hurts so much to even look to him?
then wads the use of a blog?
cant you just bloody blog?
just blog and let him read..
let the other person read...
sit down quietly and just read the bloody entry...
you claim that your blog contains your private thoughts.
but wads the use of having a blog that contains your private thoughts,
when you dun even let your other half to read it?
you guys promised each other that there will not be any secrets among you guys?
ok, promise may not be the word here but wad about trust?
trust...
other than having open communication...
trust is the one other thing that couples should never fail in doing so for each other.
letting your other half know wad you are going through now-be it through talking face to face, on the phone, or through the blog, just as long as the message is gotten across clear and clear-
is just a basic sign of trust...
the mutual trust that you guys share...
is this not wad relations are built and based on?
and you dare say that i am naive and innocent?
u trust you so much that i take you for your words...
that you and him are just friends...
that you will never ever fall for him...
i trust you...
i take you for your words...
cos i trust you...
and dun say that i'm only letting my imaginations run wild...
maybe i'm just letting my imaginations run wild,
but at least i tell you wad i'm thinking of...
that i'm jealous that you are you with him
that i'm feeling that insecurity that you might just fall for him...
that i might just lose you to him...
that you might just disappear from my life...
now you tell me that i should have the trust for your words...
but shouldn't you at least comfort my insecurities?
at least hold my hands tight and look me in the eyes and say believe me...
?
talk about me being quiet...
talk about me not saying anything...
but wad will you do now that i've spoken my piece?
how will you take it?
will you just hold me closer to your heart?
or would you just disappear like a dream when the night is over?
this is why i've never said anything...
i've choosen to keep quiet cos i'm afraid...
i'll rather things remain like this forever...
lying to myself that our relationship is as wad it looks like..
at least i still have you...
in my self delusional world...
